Par for the course

I like to golf, but not seriously. The day has to be sunny and I have to be smothered in sunscreen; head covered in one of those cute visors, balanced with a ponytail in the back. I like to rent a cart, smuggle some beers and keep track of the points for about seven rounds then suddenly I'm bored and just want to misbehave. But the serious golfer finds that irritating, and I find them just as irritating when they come rushing up in an all fired hurry to get through the course.

       "Can we play through you?" The leader of the group, says in a swift approach to take over the battlefield. His snarkiness reverberating with fake kindness and worse his body jumpy like he snorted a line of coke.
       "Sure," I reply sweetly with a tilt of the head and a smile, but I might play to the side of your head, is what I generally think, and I can. Aim for the head that is.
       
Our group stands back as the coke fiends, press forward in a rush to the finish line. When I get pissed my aim gets quite accurate. I can also hit the first drive sometimes, if I'm focused over 150 yards straight and true. I find that if I focus hard enough in any aiming sport I can move the world and opponent around like a puppet; ping-pong, tennis, golf, badminton. Perhaps that is why if I was to be a criminal I would be a sniper. It's my putting, that seems to hold me back.

It gives me great pleasure to wait and watch as they rush off into the distance. Knowing I can use irritation to my advantage. Then bending over the lush grass, to rest my ball on the tee, having selected my beloved 'Fred Flinstone' driver number uno and take my first shot. Even following it correctly with my head, I lose eye contact with it's height, speed and distance. "Sweet" I say and step back from the tee area.

I mumble to myself about the word 'fore'.... for your head... forehead; musing the invention of the word 'fore'. As I wait for our group to finish and then pack up the clubs, and return to sit down in the cart. No one is behind us at this moment and we decide to crack a beer and admire the scenery.

I try to play slow at the beginning and let all the speed golfers pass while I'm not sick of the game. However by the end of the day, I just don't care anymore and find it more pleasurable to look for free balls, aim for the ponds, enjoy the scenery and most of all, the freedom of spending the entire day outside.

But in know way... do I enjoy rushing through the game. I may cheat, but I don't like to be rushed.

Whispernet

Amazon has Whispernet, it's own version of powerful waves of technology and it's free and allows devices to sync to each other. Yesterday; The Last Frontier and I fell out of sync and for lack of a better word I was bereft. While I love that word I do not like using it for my own feelings. Today however we are back in sync. I can feel the difference, and now even many more days later, thrilled still that we are back in sync. Up to six different devices are allowed to sync with one another under one account on whispernet and not syncing with the one man I hope to marry for just one day was tragic.

I have both days off, off this week and very tired. I have been tired all week, napping in the mornings before heading to work. I love naps it is my whispernet, powerful technology to sync with the world. Sometimes naps are about sleeping, sometimes they are about syncing and other times it is just a refresh button for me.

My Mom has a Kindle and since I work on them I thought perhaps I should read a book on it myself. So I downloaded Barbara Samuel's: 'A bed of spices' and there was this lovely little poem in the front cover.

My poor heart she has caught

With magic spells and wiles

I do not sigh for gold

but for her mouth that smiles;

Her hue it is so bright she half makes blind my sight.

-Judah ha-Levi.

And made me think of the Last Frontier and how he may think about me and this is so after speaking with him. Plus he is so smart, likes naps and was not thrilled to be out of sync with me either.  And how could you not just adore a man who watches very few movies but knows who Jason Statham is and would drive 1200 miles to come and get me if the world went haywire....

That's all I'm saying.

And the poem that lies above the other in sync on the same page.

I should like to hold my knight

Naked in my arms at eve

That he might be in ecstasy

As I cushioned his head against my breast.

-Countess of Dia

Honey butter waves

Gray light infused with smoke wakes me from my dreams, dreams so real my body is on fire. I lay there and sink back into them for moments, so vivid and real that in moments I’m speaking gibberish as I toss and turn, aching throbbing and desperate for reality. 

The covers are tossed and turned like waves and as I force myself out of bed I notice with a laugh that they are pushed to the end of the bed and the down cover has fallen to the floor. Shaking my head with the power of it all and making myself wake further and get out of that bed where I can’t seem to separate dreams, reality, fantasy. He is driving me nuts and the feelings of longing make me want to cry with the sweet pain of wanting to fuck so badly I’m going cross eyed and speaking in tongues. 

Away from the soft butter sheets for an hour or two. Staring hard at the bed as I write, shaking my head as it keeps pulling me back to it, drawn back in to the warm tangled depths, as surely as honey eventually starts its slow climb down the walls of a jar trying to defy gravity. The man is tearing me apart at the seams, or I need him too anyway.

How can it not be magical? I have had good and great sex but never magical.

Let freedom ring

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkoeNLuMbcI

Hello good morning and it is a fantastic one. I have been set free of the bounds of taxes and surprisingly relieved by it. Fixed Dad and I, a grand breakfast to celebrate.

Hashbrowns
Scrambled eggs
Sauteed onions, bacon, mushrooms with spinach.

Now to catch up, here and there on writing.

Do you ever feel the power to control thoughts, dreams and desires. Sometimes in the morning I wake up feeling all powerful. Today was one of those. The point I think is to control the thoughts into being only positive and well meaning and perhaps a few dirty ones.

Also with every morning in the last few months, I was thinking about us and who we are going to be. So today in the first week of the New Year I feel incredibly free...free to be who I want to be, free of a job that stifled me and incredibly happy to be embarking on a career and love life with a company and a man that don't.

Hey your not a rock star

New kind of fun on the block in downtown Rotown. Pudding shots. That is some yummy shit. Even my Mom would like these especially the pistachio pudding ones. For New Years I headed to sassy red heads liquor store with a small side trip to the Ellensburg Liquor Store to pick up three cases of Whipped Cream Vodka. Now that is some tasty stuff too. I worked a couple of hours at the Spirit Mine and then had dinner with #61 before heading to true friends house to start the festivities.

The Pasttime was our choice of haunt for this New Years and I had so much fun it hurt. I know this; I can party like a rock star, and I'm not one. Getting to old to recover nicely any longer. But it is a rare night that I stay up playing hard, not looking at the clock. We danced and mixed drinks. I would list them all but it's rather frightening to reflect on. Saw lots of friends and not one single enemy. Lived the night with no regrets and the beauty of Roslyn Fireworks.

And Lil Pete; you crack me the hell up. By far my favorite quote that spewed from your mouth was. "You really jarred something loose tiger." And my favorite apology, "Your Jared's Mom? I'm so sorry about that prank phone call." I will return later with some pictures to post.

What is the meaning of this?

DJ Ang and Lil Pete

Truth

The morning after with #61 and True friend