Driving early the Pepto-Bismol sunrise lightens the dawn
sky, but my mood is heavy as is my heart. The opposite of love is indifference.
Yet again this song, these words play for an arrival and a departure.
We smell of alcohol and diesel. The odor makes me ache with
longing for him, for me.
We had dinner in the woods with friends Mexican themed; Polla
a la Crema, sautéed beef, peppers, beans and corn tortillas. Beer coated all
sides of the meal and dessert was tequila, whiskey and bourbon.
We sleep apart now. Even here. Sometimes I forget and reach
out to touch him. My misplaced hand reaches out and then slowly retracts in remembrance.
The weakest hour has passed in a long dark night. The
alcohol made me angry, weak and yet hopeful. Which when added and mixed
together comes out to be the equivalent of feeble. He is indifferent and I’m
discomfited and filled with cold regret.
The odor of skunk lingers as we drive through town heading
home to more separate beds with the sunrise at our backs.
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